Yorkshire Writers' Lunch

  Chaos rushed in with gleeful violence and pillaging. Cults arose like The Lunacy Markers, all demanding air time to shout down the overtired experts. Each night the Moon Clock went backwards and forwards to random times, with no discernible sequence. A probe was sent out to the satellite’s surface to hopefully disrupt any illusion or confirm a baffling truth.           Then one Monday midnight five and a half weeks later, the Moon Clock returned to twelve o’clock. Order restored, for one night at least. The Lunacy Markers insisted that this was the beginning of a new sequence, 'hitherto undreamt of'. Of course, they were obliquely announcing the end of the world. All the other cults fell in line, rushing to confirm the end times according to the Moon Clock. And yet, if you asked any one of these zealots, they couldn’t give clear justification of their doomsaying. The fact remained that no-one on Earth could comprehend the strange times they had witnessed. By this point th

  It was Monday midnight when the moon revealed its new face. Apparently everyone in the world wasn’t looking in the time it took for a giant analogue clock to appear on the light side of the satellite.           Other news was eclipsed for the rest of the night and, when daylight came, journalists spent the next few hours quizzing lunar experts on if this was a stunt, who perpetrated it, how they managed such a feat and for what purpose. No organisation or creative collective laid genuine claim to the Moon Clock event. All anyone knew was that neither the big nor little hand had moved from twelve o’clock since the big reveal.           While some nations lost sight of the spectacle due to amassments of cloud and smog, the remaining clear-sighted countries confirmed that the moon still had a clock on its face. They also announced that the hands had now moved to the time five to ten. No-one knew why.           Some claimed that the moon had asserted itself to their particular time

  Oh, how I love my Rosie, she’s a super little car. Such great fun to drive around, as we travel near and far.   They said don’t buy electric, it will always let you down. But that is simply not the case, as we bob around the town.   It’s such a gorgeous colour, officially – Rose Gold. That’s why I call her Rosie, She’s shiny, bright and bold.   So, when you buy yourself a car, don’t care what others think. ‘Cos since I purchased Rosie, I’m simply in the pink.