In a Flap by Vivien Teasdale

 

       This isn’t quite the way it seems

It’s not that I’m too fat

But sometimes life is just too much

When you live with a supercilious cat!

She made it look so easy, you see

As she gracefully rippled through

Then, nose in the air, she turned to stare

As if to say “Now you”

If she hadn’t looked at me just so

I might have been more thick-skinned

But that final flick of her high class tail

And caution was thrown to the wind

My horoscope said to stay indoors

“Have a rest, take a quick cat nap”

If I’d only listened and stayed by the fire,

I wouldn‘t be in such a flap.

Though I’ve struggled and squirmed, and scrabbled a bit

In a way that was quite ‘infra dig’

Now I can see, there’s too much of me.

In fact, I admit, I’m too big.

Just wait till I learn to unlock the door

I shall saunter abroad with a sneer

But until I discover a way to retract,

I’m afraid I shall stay right here.