A Big Plus by Owen Townend

The joke goes something like:

 

Q) What is so great about Sweden?

A) I don’t know but the flag is a big plus.

 

Gerrit? At first I laughed but then I realised that the same could be applied to the England flag. That’s a big red plus.

Doing a modicum of research then revealed that the flags of Denmark, Switzerland, Norway, Finland and Greece all feature a plus mark too. And thereby the novelty of the joke fades.

Assessing these flags though, there are a few that wouldn’t technically fit the joke. Switzerland’s flag is a small plus. Greece’s flag is a small plus hemmed in by five blue lines or four white lines depending on which colour you think most dominates the space. They wouldn’t fit as replacements for Sweden in the joke.

Denmark, Finland and Norway are all big pluses in the same way as Sweden but, let’s be honest here, are these actually plus signs? I would argue that they are crucifixes that have fallen to the left. The vertical line is not dead centre of the flag.

This would suggest that Sweden doesn’t even fit the joke. How then has it prevailed so long? Why is it so universally understood?

Now I try not to let my national pride take over my better senses but, speaking from a purely pragmatic understanding of what constitutes a big plus flag, I would have to say that England offers the one true punchline. The plus is in fact a plus sign with a centred vertical line and it fills up the whole space on the flag, thereby confirming it as ‘a big plus’.

For the record, I am not a flag enthusiast. I’m sure there is a reason why Denmark, Finland, Norway and Sweden’s flags are shaped the way they are. I’m sure there is an argument to be made about the importance of even lines on a plus sign. However, speaking as an outsider who likes to intellectualise when he is really bored, I now honestly believe that the joke should become:

 

Q) What is so great about England?

A) I don’t know but the flag is a big plus.

 

            That being said, this is not intended as a defence or brag about the country. I’m just retooling old dad jokes.