Yorkshire Writers' Lunch

  (Part 1 was on the Blog on the 10 th April)    I wait a while and press the apartment bell again. The street is very quiet, apart from a man walking slowly along the opposite pavement, singing a Richard Anthony song, loudly and badly. How come I can remember the song, but not my own name? The door opens. A tall, slim woman stands there, long hair, long dress, long fingernails. A small tattoo on a bare forearm. It must be Simone, but the memory is hazy. She reaches out and kisses me on the cheek. Not on the lips. What does that mean?     “You don’t look good Liam! Where have you been?” Liam! That’s good to know. She makes no move to invite me inside. No lip-kissing, no invitation. There’s a message here.     “I got lost and ended up sleeping at the bus station,” I lie. “I have your key and wanted to bring it back … and to see you, naturally.” I’m struggling to talk in sentences. “Could I perhaps come in?”     “I...

      “Monsieur?” A tone of concern. I can hear his voice, but I’m face down on wet grass and can’t see the man. It takes a little time to get my limbs working. I turn and look up at him. He must be about sixty, balding, a small moustache which looks like it’s been painted on.     “Hello,” I say. In English.     “Are you OK? he asks. “Do you need a doctor?” Do I? There’s this feeling that I should stay away from any part of the system … that something has gone wrong … and until I find out what …     “No, thank you. I’m fine. Too much wine you know!” He looks doubtful. Perhaps I look bad but not in a drunk way. “But could you tell me where I am?”     “Sure. You must have had a good night! This is the Rue Maitre Albert. Notre Dame is just at the end of the street,” he says, turning to point the way. “With the rain overnight, it’s lucky you have a good waterproof.” A pity my jeans aren’t also waterp...

To visit Vienna is to taste history.  So let me take you there. Just for a day.  But what a day! We will start by taking breakfast at Schönbrunn Palace, with Empress MariaTheresa, in the 1740’s.  She created much of the palace as it appears today and she bore sixteen children, so we are privileged that such a busy woman has time for breakfast. This spectacular palace’s lavish interior is only matched by its beautiful grounds and it is not surprising that the Hapsburg dynasty enjoyed it as their summer residence for so many years. Gaze out of one of the windows at the back, down through pristine lawns, to the Gloriette, an ornate stone edifice on a small hilltop. It was used as viewing platform by the Hapsburgs but now houses a café. Sorry about that, Your Imperial Majesty. Now we must hop into our horse drawn carriage, our Fiaker, and be whisked along to Café Landtmann, established in 1873. Landtmann’s is the epitome of a Viennese coffee house. Lush, vel...

Changing flights at JFK airport in New York from London on route to Kingston Jamaica is not my favourite thing to do, but Delta and Virgin airlines have a relationship and had a super deal with Premium seats, so the inconvenience of an eight-hour layover 6 th to 7 th of June 2019, seemed worth it. I had it all figured out in my head that I would spend the night asleep in the lounge, but when I got there I was invited to look around and thought that for $70 there wasn’t that much on offer. The buffet looked tired, and people were lounging around on comfy chairs fair enough, but that was not what I was expecting to see. I had fantasised about little cubicles where I could really lay out and snore.   It was now close to midnight  and my departure was at 7am. I realised that my phone had lost power and I didn’t have a charger on me with the correct electrical plug as that was all snug in my suitcase. Eventually, I found the parade of airport shops which were all closed apart fro...

This was first written in 2014 whilst working out in Yangon, Myanmar. I had never shared a house with a stranger before nor a dog.   John was originally from Hertfordshire but had been working for the British Council in Myanmar for 10 years. His dog Li slept with him and was a fine example of man’s best friend. So here I was house sharing with a dog lover. The property had a huge gate and wire fencing all around. We had been relocated here due to a flood in the previous accommodation.  I am standing behind as we look at the muddy water Li and I are heading downstairs I had noticed that Li was well fed by the domestic help and was not taken for walks. John left early for work and returned in the evening.   At this new house the big gate had a gap and the dog had tried repeatedly to squeeze himself under it. One Saturday I observed him really excited as he communicated through the bars, with a dog who was on the other side of the gate, Li tried to wrigg...